How to raise your daughter to have a positive body image

“Happiness and confidence are the prettiest things you can wear.” – Taylor Swift




Like I didn’t already love Tay Tay enough- those words,,, preach! Self Esteem is something I have struggled with my entire life. More so body image if we want to get particular.  Truth be told, if I wasn’t terrified of going under the knife, I would be the first one in line for a nose job and other fixes I think I need… just being honest here guys.

As a child I remember always being conscious of my weight, always comparing my clothes and hair to all of the other girls, and just not being happy with the way I looked. I managed to be a size 0 throughout high school, ( and I became home schooled… but that’s a different story for a different day… let’s just say that size 0 didn’t happen by eating,,, more so a lack there of).  I went through life being SO unhappy in my younger years. It makes me cringe to think about what terrible memories I have of it all.

Fast forward to meeting Cory… when we first met we went on dates every single freaking day… he had just gotten out of the marines (so he was skinny as all heck) and all of our dates consisted of eating. The man loves his pizza puffs and mint chocolate chip shakes. I remember being so uncomfortable in the beginning, not wanting to eat any of that to maintain my “perfect” figure- and him insisting that I was PERFECT in every way and that having a damn pizza puff wouldn’t change a thing. He was right. I ate the pizza puff, and it didn’t change anything. He made me feel feel like the prettiest girl in the entire world ( and still does!) I got so lucky you guys.

Fast forward to getting pregnant with Gi, no one even realized I was pregnant until honestly month 8 maybe? I was SO tiny. The day I gave birth my stomach was back to being as flat as a board… couldn’t even tell I had a baby. It was f a b u l o u s.

Then I got pregnant with Colton… I didn’t get huge, but definitely bigger then I did with Gi. ( normal because your body knows what it’s doing the second go around)  Again, gave birth, and that day my stomach went back to being flat and I left the hospital in my cute little romper.

Well, let’s fast forward to today. It was sunny and 75- actually got up to 80! How is this March? #chicagoweather.  Anyhoo, I decided to pack away winter clothes and start taking spring and summer ones out. OF course I decided to try some shorts on because I’m all for Good-Willing anything that doesn’t fit/I won’t wear this season. I tried on a pair of size 2 shorts I bought last summer expecting to wear them this year. Tried them on and it was a no-go. My hips…. nope… nope… nope. Not going to happen. I immediately burst in to tears. Colt was napping and I thought Gi was too.. turns out she wasn’t. She came in to my room and said “Mommy why are you crying?!” I quickly got myself in order and changed said subject! She saw I was trying on clothes and looked dead into my eyes and said: ” Mama you are the prettiest lady in the entire whole wide world!” If that isn’t enough to make your heart melt I don’t know what is.

I immediately flashed back to growing up unhappy with myself and thought THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL GIULIANA WILL EVER HAVE THOSE FEELINGS. I will not let myself be upset over being a size 4. How silly is that? Realistically, even though my weight is below what I was before getting pregnant, my hips are going to be wider and that’s just not going to change. I had two babies and I need to be proud of it!

I never let Giuliana hear me “bash myself” or complain about the way I look, but I can only imagine that I reflect those feelings in some way or another whether I realize it or not.  I actively try to instill the confidence I am teaching her to have in myself. It’s tough being a girl. There is so much pressure to look good, and to look a certain way, that it really can take a toll on someone.

With times changing, and our world getting crazier by the day, It’s more important now then ever to instill confidence and a healthy body image in our daughters.

Here are 5 ideas on how to empower your daughter to have a positive body image:


  1. Affirm beauty– I tell Giuliana every single day how pretty she is.  She smiles ear to ear 🙂
  2. Focus on Brains– Gi is a smarty pants and she knows it. Build up that it’s important to have brains not only beauty.
  3. Get moving– Especially now that the weather is nice, we take walks, run around the park… She is signed up for dance camp this summer and sports with her cousins!
  4. Healthy Choices– I will never be the parent that tells her she can’t have a cupcake, or that having fries will make her fat, However, we try to make healthy choices and eat all other not so great for you things in moderation. She knows that “healthy” foods give her energy and help her grow big & strong!
  5. BE a role model– Obviously I touched on this earlier but this is really the most important. Actions speak louder than words. Be confident and love yourself, your daughter needs to see that more than anything!